The Five Hole Fantasy Draft: Orange County Weight Shakers

Brianne’s Turn…

In the second round of 5hole Fantasy Draft, my team, the Orange County Weight Shakers, will be adding some serious spice to our roster. Think pesky studs and finnish sex gods. 

For my two forwards this round, I’m choosing Jarkko Ruutu of the Anaheim Ducks and Maxim Lapierre of the Vancouver Canucks. Many would think I’m going the “douchebag route” with these choices, but for me they are being chosen because they are personal favorites of mine. Both are known for being pests- agitating opponents, trying to get under their skin, and hopefully drawing penalties which could lead to power play goals.

 Jarkko is not typically found conventionally good looking. To me, however, he is your regular badass and that is easy to find sexy. You have to admit, this fine Finnish man looks as though he knows how to PARTY. 

Maxim on the other hand is your classic beauty. He’s French Canadian so you know that accent could woo you in a heart beat. When I met him, I practically melted. On the ice everyone sees an obnoxious instigator, but off the ice he is easily one of the most charming hockey players I’ve ever met. Probably why he has a slutty reputation off the ice, but let’s face it- what woman wouldn’t hit that? He was only on my team for a brief amount of time before being traded to the Canucks. In that time he didn’t score a goal or make a big difference in the way our game was played. Probably why he was one of our players traded by the trade deadline. However, he really showed up for the Canucks in the later part of the season and in the playoffs. After all, he did have the lone goal in game 5 of the Stanley Cup Finals, helping his team to be within one win of the Stanley Cup. If you pay any attention to hockey, you know how the rest of that turned out.

 In goal I have Pekka Rinne of the Nashville Predators. What can I say, I have a major soft spot for the Finns! Not only is this goaltender extremely talented, but he’s hot to boot. His team made it to the second round of the playoffs this past season for the first time in club history, only to eventually fall to the Vancouver. While I sat and rooted against his team, I couldn’t help but be proud when he beasted his team to a win. He’s a Vezina candidate, and while he likely won’t win because of Tim Thomas’s nomination, it’s safe to say he is the sexiest beast nominated.

For defenseman I’m going with Sami Lepisto of the Phoenix Coyotes (Blue Jackets, actually–can’t think of him as anything but a’Yote). Yet again, I have to reiterate: I LOVE Finnish people. This guy was on the Finnish national team when they recently won gold at Worlds. He, like the rest of the team, flew back to Helsinki and partied like there was no tomorrow. Pictures of naked Finns getting drunk in the street still stick in my mind. Now if only one of those naked Finns had been this guy, we would have all been in for a treat! This guy has a smoldering look to him and the coveted dark hair and light eye combo. Not to mention he’s tall and tan- what’s not to like?

**I DEMAND another picture of Lepisto…I mean it.  There’s your homework, Team Weight-Shakers…(Mary)

*  Pictures sources: Ruutu- that’s a personal one I cropped myself out of but it was taken by Frank Tran.

Lapierre- another personal photo but it was taken with my camera so no one needs to be credited.

Rinne- I found that on tumblr along time ago.

Lepisto- that’s from his facebook :). His problem if he doesn’t make his profile private! Haha

Follow here for more Five Hole Fantasy Draft or Cardiac Cane.

We’re on Twitter!  Twitter@FiredUpCannon  Twitter@OSUJoe

What’s on your mind? Tell me!  mycannon10@yahoo.com